[Draakor]

- 31 Mar 2014 13:00 #119870

This is my FIRST story ever!!!

Sorry, I didn't know. But still...wait... ooh! Idea! Thanks, TheDiamondRanger!

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Thanks, Burgy, for the signature image.

[BMW1991]

- 01 Apr 2014 19:36 #120088 It's not bad for a first story. But try and through some twists in there, or as you continue. And another thing, when you're describing a character, try and show examples of their traits and not just say them in a boring way. Keep up the good work and keep writing!

[1Charak2]

- 02 Apr 2014 01:59 #120131

It's not bad for a first story. But try and through some twists in there, or as you continue. And another thing, when you're describing a character, try and show examples of their traits and not just say them in a boring way. Keep up the good work and keep writing!

plot twist Their is no twists
Plot twist I lied!
Plot twist that was a lie
Plot twist I died..
Plot twist the first 2 are right.

For every loss There is Victini